“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” Genesis 2:24
Whether male or female, the relationship with one’s parents is, in most cases, close, loving and loyal. Babies rely totally on their parents to provide for, food, water and to protect them. Because of this, parents tend to see their children as their children, whatever their age. But life moves on; babies become children, then teenagers, then adults and eventually, perhaps, parents themselves. Parents have to teach their children to mature, become independent and be able to take on the same role in the lives of the next generation. That progression inevitably changes the dynamics of the relationship between all those involved. Yehovah intends that as we grow up, we develop close and intimate relationships of our own. If and when he marries, Yehovah says that a man leaves his father and mother to cleave to his own wife. He must leave in order to cleave. Cleave means to cling to, join, be glued together with, in this case, his wife. It indicates affection, loyalty, closeness and a prioritising of that relationship over every other relationship. It is illustrated, although in different circumstances, when Ruth said to Naomi, “Where you go, I will go, where you lodge, I will lodge; your people will be my people; your Yehovah will be my Yehovah.” The Scriptures say Ruth cleaved to Naomi and they became inextricably bonded together.
Likewise, when he marries, a man leaves his father and mother to cleave to his bride. That relationship must take absolute priority over any and all other relationship either of them may have with anybody else, including their parents. Yehovah’s plan is that they become one, not only physically, but in spirit, direction and affection. This oneness is a joining of independent individuals as two, united and interdependent upon each another. In marriage, I, me, my, change to we, us and our. When their “children” marry, while it may be a challenge, parents must release and let them go. From that point on, parents cannot be the predominant influence in their grown-up children’s lives. And both bride and groom must prioritise that relationship over any other, including with their own parents.